By Caitlyn Hallman
It’s been several years since the Spice Girls phenomenon took the world by storm. It’s been so long in fact, that most of the group has fallen into deep obscurity. That is with the exceptions of Geri and Victoria (a.ka. Ginger and Posh). They are still in the media’s eye, not only for their personal endeavors but because of their well-known rivalry. So, which one really is better? Always at the fore-front of topical pop debate, KIU embarked on in-depth research to get to the bottom of this issue. After pouring through countless issues of ‘Hello!,’ ‘Okay’ and ‘Closer’ magazines, as well as reading both ladies’ biographies, here are the results:
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| Geri | vs. | Victoria |
| GERI: | Hopelessly single. Can’t even get an actor to play her boyfriend in the movie she is supposed to be starring in. |
| VICTORIA: | Married to David Beckham, captain of England’s football squad. |
| GERI: | Has a pet dog, which she dresses in identical outfits to herself. |
| VICTORIA: | Has two sons, Brooklyn and Romeo. |
| GERI: | Celebrity best friend is George Michael. |
| VICTORIA: | Celebrity best friend is Elton John. |
| GERI: | Can’t sing. |
| VICTORIA: | Can’t sing. |
| GERI: | Former unsuccessful topless model. |
| VICTORIA: | Former dancer in West End musicals. |
| GERI: | Has suffered from eating disorders. |
| VICTORIA: | Has suffered from eating disorders encouraged by Geri. |
| GERI: | No one wants her. |
| VICTORIA: | Is wanted by kidnappers. |
| GERI: | Has written two books about herself. |
| VICTORIA: | Has written one book about herself, and had an unauthorized written about her by Andrew Morton (who also did one for Princess Diana). |
| GERI: | Is ginger!!!! |
| VICTORIA: | Is posh. |
| GERI: | Made news as one of the ‘celebrity judges’ on Pop Stars: The Rivals. |
| VICTORIA: | Makes news nearly everyday as part of ‘celebrity’s royal’ couple. |
| GERI: | Left Spice Girls because traveling was ‘too stressful.’ |
| VICTORIA: | Stayed with Spice Girls, despite the stress of a long-distance relationship and death threats. |
| GERI: | Quickly lost weight after being deemed ‘Fat Spice.’ |
| VICTORIA: | Quickly lost weight after giving birth. |
| GERI: | Is parodied by everyone. |
| VICTORIA: | Is parodied by the character Chardonnay on hit television show ‘Footballers’ Wives.’ |
| GERI: | Was named as a ‘demonic little girl’ by ex-lover Robbie Williams. |
| VICTORIA: | Was named Style Icon of the Year by Elle. |
The winner is: Victoria. She’s classier, not ginger, and culturally more significant. Let’s face it, Posh and Becks are going to be in the public spotlight for years to come. There will be new front-page headlines for every child they have. As for Geri, she’s doing reality television. Everyone knows that’s the graveyard for celebrity careers.
