Matthew Laborteaux
Where Are You?

By Caitlyn Hallman

This is an urgent APB for actor Matthew Laborteaux.  Laborteaux, one of the child stars of 70’s classic television program ‘Little House on the Prairie,’ seems to have fallen off the face of the earth (or at least off of the internet).  There are many sites on the web dedicated to the star, but not a single one provides current information.  Even his fan club on Yahoo is bereft of news. 

The last known spotting of Laborteaux was some three or four years ago and is a picture of him at his brother’s wedding.  Matthew Laborteaux (if this photo is to be believed) has grown from a cute boy to a genuinely handsome man.  We at KIU believe that it is a crime against humanity for a genuinely handsome man to retreat from public view.  As there are only five genuinely handsome men in the whole world, it is a great loss for the public at large when one of them disappears from sight.  We are then forced to pay attention to somewhat handsome men, vaguely handsome men, and if-you-squint-and-tilt-your-head-sidewise-he’s-a-bit-handsome men.

Matthew, we perfectly understand if you no longer wish to be associated with your child star image, however, we believe the world deserves to get to know you as you are now.  Please, get into contact with us at KIU.  As you can tell from our exclusive interview with Mark Lester, we have a great rapport with and tact in relating to former child stars, and we would be honored if you would chose to use our website to break your silence. 

Please, the public needs you.