It began just as any other Monday night.  Dressed in my casual 'just going to chill' clothes, I headed out the door in great anticipation of the night ahead.  What songs should I select?  Will there be any hot bois there tonight?  And if so, will I get to go home with one of them? (Pause) Of course I will, what a silly question!  Or, maybe it will just be a fun night with friends...singing, drinking, and then heading off to 'Gay' Denny's for all-night chatter and coffee.  Either way, I didn't see how I could lose.  Monday nights were always 'fagtabulous' no matter what happened.  And trust me, something was always going to happen.

On this particular October, Monday night, after returning to my seat from using the restroom and chatting with some guys in the back of the bar, my friend, Curtis, pointed out to me this rather handsome, if not gorgeous, individual.  He was sitting in a booth at the end of our row of connecting tables.  Although I was the furthest away from him, I could see that he had shiny jet-black hair that was wavy and curly with lots of swirls.  You could tell that he had spent a lot of time on his 'do'.  He had high-cheek bones, slanted dark brown eyes, a beautiful strong nose, and soft red lips. His light sugary brown skin reflected a softness of a cherub.  He seemed tall, although I only saw him while he was seated. He was slim, dressed in slacks, shirt, and tie.  He could have been wearing a loin-clothe and it wouldn't have mattered. In fact, I would have rather had it that way.  Soon, others at the table were beginning to notice him, and I made my claim to my evening prize, my 'garcon du soir'.  Like Janis Joplin on heroin, I found my drug and I needed to get a fix!  In good fun, my friends argued with me that they would get him before I could even have a chance.  However, I was the only one with the lust for Asians, and this guy was definitely of Asian decent.  I wasn't stupid either, and I can tell you that no matter what your preference, this guy was an angelic vision, and I wasn't about to let anyone move in on my territory.  He was on of those guys that could even make a straight man feel those unspeakable stirrings in his jeans and question which side of the fence he was truly on.  I couldn't keep my eyes off of him.  I was drooling.  He was just totally jaw-dropping gorgeous!  I was ready to devour him like a Popsicle in Hell!  But...there was one little problem.  While I was caught up in my lust, I didn't see that he was sitting with somebody. He was a cute twink.  I thought aloud, "Is this his boifriend?  Is this his date?  Are they just friends having a drink?"  The longer I observed their exchange, the more I was convinced that they must only be friends. My hopes sprang alive again, like an engorged member on Viagra!

Finally, it was my turn to sing my first song.  I was still quite new to karoake, so I hadn't really built up a great repertoire from which to select.  This night, as usual, I started out with "At This Moment" by Billy Vera and the Beaters.  It's a nice little, soulful, sexy song that I figured I could get 'my man's' attention.  I took the mic with confidence, looked at Curtis and my other friends and said, "Watch this".  I was going to begin my 'mating ritual' of luring my prey.  I began singing in my soulful, black gospel style.  I made sure that I was facing the table where my Asian appetizer was sitting, just waiting for the opportunity to make eye contact.  As I got to the middle of the song, I still hadn't been able to get his attention.  I looked with bewilderment at my friends, who simply shrugged and laughed at me.  I hit my high notes in a smooth, but powerful stride, and the low notes were sexy and gritty.  I sang the song without a flaw, and still no reaction!  The song ended and I thought to myself, 'How could this be?'  I sat down confused and humiliated.  Had I lost the power of my charms?  My friends urged me to just go up and talk to him, but I couldn't get my nerve.  That just would have been too easy.  I had to play my game.  My arrogant confidence, like a proud erect penis, had gone flaccid.  I waited patiently for my turn to come around again, hoping against hope that this Beauty wouldn't leave yet, so I might try again to put him in my vocal trance.

I sang my second song, and was still ignored.  "Damn!  They MUST be lovers!” I said to my friends. I HAD to come to that conclusion, because the whole time that they were there, they never looked at anybody. You see, I sat with the 'cream of the crop' at karoake, so if he didn't noticed me, surely he would have noticed one of my other friends...that is, if he were single.

Before I knew it, my Asian Angel left, like Cinderella at the stroke of midnight. The pain that came sweeping over me was unbearable.  The fantasy world that I had created with my Dream Lover in those few short hours left me weak and unfulfilled.  I checked with the bartenders and our 'alcohol transportation specialists' (waiters) and nobody could tell me who he was or where he came from.  He became my 'Mystery Meat'.  Next time I saw him, I would not let him so easily escape my wiles.

Lightening strikes twice...

Months had passed.  Men came, I swallowed, and they left. Every Monday night that I would show up to Wink's with my hopes high that this 'Beauty' would return.  But, week after week, I was left disappointed. I soon accepted the fact that I would never see him again and it was time to move on.  Actually, I was dating two guys by the end of December.  Daniel, a cute Vietnamese/American and Chris a handsome Hispanic. I liked them both, but I was not quite sure that I really wanted a relationship.  Yes, I was getting a little tired of the 'one night stands', but I wasn't sure if I was ready to settle down.  Daniel was a little cutie.  He was twenty-two years old but looked like a sixteen-year-old lesbian.  He had that kind of hairstyle that you had to look twice, maybe even a third time to make sure it was a guy.  But, he was a doll!  He definitely put to rest the rumors that Asian men got the 'short end of the stick'.  However, he was clingy, possessive, and wanted all my attention.  Chris, on the other hand, wanted to be in control. That he was.  I could never say "No" to him.  I've never felt this powerless, except with a childhood friend of mine that could get me to do anything he wanted, when he wanted it.  And yes, I do mean ANYTHING.  Chris played me, as I found out later, he was seeing his ex-boyfriend behind my back. This, of course, made me want to be with him more.  You know...those bad boys!  The only downfall for Chris was that he was hairy (yuck), and he put a major damper on the rumors that Hispanics enjoy 'greatness'. Now, I'm not a size queen, but I do have to admit...bigger IS better!  I resigned myself to the belief that I would need to choose between Danny and Chris.  I made lists of the pros and cons for both and still couldn't make a decision.  I was determined to settle on one of them, until...lightening struck again!

I had gone to Wink's alone on this Monday night.  It was about a week before Christmas, and there was a very small crowd left, as it was about an hour before closing.  I was sitting with my friends, with my back towards the door.  A friend of mine signaled me to turn around.  I turned and my jaw about hit the floor!  There he was!  He was finally back!  He sat at the bar behind me, and I would turn around to look at him.  Every time I turned, we locked eyes and he would nudge his head and flash me this big pearly white smile.  Oh gawd, I was in Heaven!  But, I just couldn't get up to talk to him.  I was called on for my last song, which just happened to be "Last Dance”, by Donna Summer.  I got up to sing and winked at my friend to let him know, now was the time to make my move.  I sang my head off and my Asian Angel watched me the whole time just smiling away.  'Yes!  Yes!  Yes!' I thought, 'I have him this time!' After I finished singing to him, I walked up to him and attempted to put my hand on his chest.

"Hi.  My name is David.  What's your name?" I asked.

"I'm Duran."  He said, as he smiled and grabbed my hand off of his chest.

"Duane?  You're name is Duane?"  I couldn't quite make out what he had said.

"No.  It's Duran.  Y'know, like Duran Duran."  He replied, once again meeting my hand as I reached out to touch his chest.  This time he gently held it and brought it down to rest on his leg.

"Oh, Duran.  Well Duran, it's nice to see you here tonight."  I replied, my confidence ever growing.

"Thanks."  He smiled again.  He had obviously been out drinking and he was a couple of sheets to the wind.

So, as not to push it, I simply asked, "Are you going to be here next Monday night?"

"I don't know." was his reply.

"Well, I hope you show up."  And with that, I confidently shook his hand and walked away.

I couldn't believe that I just let him go like that, but I wanted to see what was going to happen. Plus, I had to figure out the Danny and Chris thing.  It was a week from Hell!

The next Monday came, and sure enough he arrived.  I didn't really think that he would show, because I really didn't think that he would remember our conversation.  But, there he was.  He had brought a friend with him, so I moved over to a booth, so not to be bothered with my friends and their little smart-ass comments.  We talked for a few hours and found that we were raised very similar to each other.  Well, he were both raised in the same kind of religion, so our belief systems were very similar.  I asked him where he came from.  He told me that he was raised in Colorado/New Mexico.  I thought that strange, because I had not heard of a lot of Asian people living in places like Durango, Colorado or Farmington, New Mexico. So, I asked what 'nationality' he was.  You can't believe the horror...the shock...the let down that was to befall me from asking this question.  He told me that he was half Hispanic and half Navajo.  I was so taken back I had to ask him if he was sure.

"You're not Filipino?"  I desperately asked.

"Nope."  He said.

"Are you sure you're not Asian of some kind?"  I asked again.

"No" he laughed, "I'm Hispanic and Navajo.  Although I've had some people think that I look Asian, but I'm not."

"Wow.  All of us over there (pointing to my friends) thought that you were Asian from the first time that you were in here a few months back."  I openly confessed.

I explain to him that I had seen him back in October and wondered where he had gone since.  He let me know that his grandfather was sick and he had to fly back to New Mexico to take care of him.  And yes, the guy that he was sitting with that night was just a friend.  (Whoo Hoo!!!)

Our conversation had ended and he walked me out to my truck. (I know...how butch of me, right?) I thought that I had to be honest with my new friend Duran.  I told him that I was seeing two other guys and thought it best for us to just be friends.  He tried to hide his feelings, but I could see great disappointment well up in his eyes.  I asked him if I could take him anywhere, and he declined.  He said that he understood and that we could just be friends.  I left him there, while kicking myself.  What did I just do?  How could I be so stupid?!

To make an already long story a little short...we had met a few times at Wink's.  He gave me his number and I gave him mine.  About three weeks had passed and I had finally decided to give Danny and Chris the "so long" talk.  I told Duran that I wanted to see him and him alone.  We had gotten into these phone conversations that would last for hours, and just the sound of his bass voice would give me chills and send shivers up and down my spine.  To hear Duran say "hello" to me was an orgasmic event.  I was definitely hooked on this guy!

(On a side note: Before I pledged myself to Duran, I did get my Asian fix with this little Laotian guy.  He was adorable and I had my eye on him for about six months.  It had been my goal to sleep with an Asian man from each Asian country.  I had two Filipinos, one Vietnamese, and one Laotian.  China, Japan, Sri Lanka, Korea, Thailand, and others had evaded me...but a goal is a goal!)

Duran and I officially began our relationship on January 17th, 1995.  However, his grandfather had passed, which was the man who raised him, so he was like a father, when in actuality it was his Great Uncle.  I know… it confuses me as well, but it is way too much to try to explain.  He had left for about a week, but we kept in contact by phone.  I missed him dearly and anxiously waited for his return.

The strange thing about this whole situation is...I had not slept with Duran yet.  We had gone out on one of our first dates, and when I tried to kiss him in my room, he was shaking.  I've never seen anybody tremble that much.  I would have normally been offended, but I realized Duran didn't like just anybody touching him.  In fact, he didn't like ANYBODY touching him.  Well, I attacked him and gave him a huge kiss and attempted to get 'it on' with him, but he pushed me off.  It took me three more weeks before I could get him into bed with me.  By that time, although I was starting to have my doubts, I was totally hooked on him and felt myself falling completely in love with this little Hispanic Hiawatha!  When he finally allowed me to do what I had been dying to do to him since our first conversation on the phone, it was soooo very worth it.  I knew that it was going to be the perfect relationship that I had hoped for all these years!